Happy Anniversary is a phrase that we use when we want to commemorate a joyful/happy event or celebration in the lives of people we know, a businesses we support and even a political or historical annual celebration.
Most of us are less likely to commemorate or celebrate the annual death of our loved ones. The very thought of that yearly date in our minds, can throw us into a state or depression, foreboding, and distress. I admit, that first anniversary of Danielle's and Tom's death was devastating. I was so overwhelming for me because they died on the same day, except a year apart.
I allowed the doctors to disconnect my husband from the mechanism that were keeping him alive after his body collapsed and succumbed to the lung cancer and the shut down of all of his systems. I asked God if He knew what day it was! It was the first anniversary of Danie's death. And I said, "Lord, how can you ask me to let Tom go on the very day his daughter died just a year ago.
Nonetheless, my son, Trevor, spoke words of comfort and wisdom and said, "Mom Dad would want to be with Danie, and then you would have only one day of remembrance to deal with. So wisdom prevailed and now, I can reflect on the fact that both of them are together in the presence of the Lord.
Today, I can celebrate their lives, but It took a whole lot of staying in the Word or God, continuing to cultivate my prayer life, being around spiritual people who prayed for me and with me, reading books on death and bereavement and seeking a spiritual counselor. And yes, taking some medication periodically as needed in order to get some much needed rest and sleep.
When Paul says, "All things work together for the good......Rom 8:29, that is what I found to be true in my case.The enemy would like nothing more than to keep those who have suffered the death of a loved one, or the loss of someone through divorce separation, lost of a job, etc, held captive and enslaved to their emotions. We have to be careful because an ongoing state of grief can lead to serious mental breakdowns, sickness, and disease in your body. Please seek the help that you need in that first year of being without your loved one.
I felt lonely and abandoned when I lost Tom, because Trevor got married about three weeks later. The wedding was already planned and his Dad had given his blessing whether he would be there to see it or not. Being without both men in my life was hurtful. I played around for more than a year, thinking I could pray it out, shout it out, have someone lay hands on me and pour oil on me. but the pain was still there. It doesn't matter how much Holy Ghost you have, losing a loved one is painful and multiple losses, can take you out. That is why, I sought professional counseling.
Today I am much better! I know tomorrow is the BIG DAY they both transitioned. But now, I can look back, shed a tear , a few of them, and rejoice over the manifold blessings that he has given me over the last six years. God is Amazing, and He continues to show Himself strong and mighty on my behalf. Losing my loved ones did not make me bitter, only better. he turned my misery into a ministry. My book: "Don't Forget to Say Your Prayers" and Carest Thou Not If I Parish", is the journey that led to my healing and deliverance. I didn't know an author was inside of me!!!
And I am no different from you. Everybody has a story to tell. Everyone can be the answer to someones problem. Sometimes we have to bear the scars for somebody else's deliverance. Hang on in there, God will reward you for leading someone out of bondage and into the marvelous light of His grace, truth and mercy.
So I may not post anything tomorrow as I will be preparing to go to a prayer retreat on the annual day of my loves transition. To God Be The Glory. I am still Usable. I am still here by the grace of God.
Congratulations Tom and Danielle. You are Still Both In The Presence Of The Lord. I Celebrate You On Tomorrow. Love You Both. See You In The Morning.
And I say it often enough: Don't Forget To Say Your Prayers!!!